2020: Living on Vibes and Grace.
Mondays.
Monday steals the joy of Pentecostals: it is the solemn worship of religious assemblies giving way to the chaos and madness that lurks around the city on a new workday. While the togetherness that comes with cell Fellowships marks the end of Sunday's plot; one easily forgets this ritual, as the body races the alarm clock for a quick head starts into Lagos traffic.
For many job seekers, days of the week are nothing but social construct: at best, they are pointers into the dual identity of time; steals away when you're busy, and feels like an eternity when you count the years of your joblessness.
3rd week, July 2020.
Nothing much has changed since the pandemic began; isolation and a handful of sad news. The week like the year had been a mass of grief trapped in this fragile body. In this chaos, there has been a constant struggle for hope, for peace, and for answered prayers. So much to say about the tongue being that small but unequivocal member of a power-tussle group, with a cult following and unmatched relevance. So I use it often to send loads of prayers and protest into God’s heavens.
But Lagos doesn't care about these things, neither does it bother about you being idle somewhere on the Mainland; it slowly but surely unveils its madness. Here am I, gathering the part of myself alive to see yet another week; waiting for the sunset, so I could reignite with family at a bible study group on YouTube; this had been my ritual since covid happened.
Becoming.
I had picked up bad habits and easily triggered by trivial, but that's what one becomes when one lives in a country that kills its citizens before they're named. The first half of the year has had me in between job interviews and aptitude tests, and the constant checks on yahoo mail and outlook in search for what might be a congratulatory mail to a dream job.
If trojan wars and Greek sports were known for high adrenaline and as death festivals; checking emails easily fits as a subgroup: the panic of rejection letters, the unreplied applications, and thousands more gathering dust in the draft. On extremely sad days, there are few left as spam mails; these pass as annotations to one’s village people having a stake at halting one’s growth- more like board members making critical decisions about one’s life. While logic makes a mockery of this idea, most times disappointments and how they happen, have no regard for deductive reasonings; you put the blame on the monitoring spirits in your lineage to keep your sanity in check.
Job Hunting
Job hunting ruined what was supposed to be a fun-filled first half of the year for me, Covid-19 made it worse. Never did I imagine that by the third week of July, I would be relatively jobless in a pandemic (relative, because God forbid you to explain to people that you work as a content writer).
I’ve always had my mess together; more like a relic of the Christian notion of grace: an idea I strongly believe in. The first week after graduating from University, a neighbor had developed an interest in me from a distance, and decided to offer me what will turn out to be an eight-month work experience with the team of Lagos Community Updates, a media frontier for the administration of the then Governor of Lagos State, Akinwunmi Ambode; a program pay-cheque by the Ministry of Information and Strategy, Lagos State.
While Lagos Community Updates was and is still a family I revere; the experience and training gained are stockpiled in my today’s work ethics. I have always believed I wasn’t made for hard days; then service year came, and everything changed.
National Youth Service Corps
I witnessed the toughest phase of my life in the twelve months I spent in Bayelsa, and ironically, had the best memory this twenty plus years of living has offered me. Many fond memories about the riverine state and its people. Some nights, I’m out sleeping in the cold wondering how God has neglected his own; other days, I’m consoled that Israel still found the promised land after all. It was here, Bayelsa, I was threatened to be killed by members of the Special Anti Robbery Squad; my crime was having a laptop in my traveling bag. #EndSars
Post Nysc: Healing
November 2019, I left Bayelsa for Lagos; back home with the optimism that the good things in this part of town were restlessly waiting for me to arrive. Initially, it seemed so, with an invitation to sit for an aptitude test with KPMG, which I barely had time to prepare for. While my KPMG miss became a painful pill to swallow, I had to ignore the scab and let the wound heal.
February 2020
February was a miracle that never happened. I had gotten an offer for an interview at one of the leading Literary firms in the country, situated on the Mainland. This was a dream job for me because it was my space, what I ditched law for. I was ready to do anything here, not minding if the role was not related. But the year came with surprises. Whatever happened in the interview room, to date, I can’t recall. It’s hard to explain forgetfulness. All I remember was working into a big room filled with people I’ve met at Literary festivals; authors whose books add color to my bookshelf; and editors I fan-boy from a distance. All I remember was going to the interview with anti-malaria drugs in my pocket and prayer verses gathering Amen in my mouth; but whatever happened during the interview, I don’t remember.
I’ve come to learn that strange thing happen; and when they do happen, move on, the why will find answers for itself.
I will later get job offers from a new generation Bank, a test invite from an Energy firm, and a contract offer from an Insurance company; but the pandemic happened.
March 2020.
The Lagos State Government through the Ministry of Health had just released an official statement that the state had recorded its index case of the Corona Virus. It became a common joke in town, about how a foreign virus had become the bane for a large percentage of people who have never left the shores of their country. With the peculiarities of the city, I knew there was no way in God’s earth, that we weren’t heading for a total lockdown; which eventually happened. The pandemic was here.
Job hunting in a pandemic
Searching for a job in the midst of a pandemic and trying to survive the scare of the virus was a herculean task. Mastering the art of keeping one’s head above water was a total miracle. This became the period of existing, surviving, and breathing. There were the constant interjections by people asking what you’ve been up to, or unsolicited advice about why you should learn skills XYZ. But I had to learn the coping mechanisms of minding my business and growing at my pace: writing, reading, listening to songs, praying, anything. God bless the sad songs.
July: the beginning of good things
July came with its flowers. July is a reminder that miracle still happens. In the previous month, I had applied for a job at Flutterwave, and that was it.
I had become an admirer of Flutterwave through various random tweets by the tech community on Twitter. A lot had been said and written about this fintech company; and unconsciously, I became adhered to its story. I started reading articles on how a company in the continent, owned by young African ‘boys’, is trying to simplify payments across the continent and beyond.
Time passed and the days grew old without a reply from the team at Flutterwave, till it got to the point that I totally forgot that I had applied for a job opportunity there. As a job seeker, one’s job description is to keep applying for jobs: the ones you’re qualified for and the ones your resume doesn’t match. Often times you apply for the ones you know are slave offers, but you console yourself that anything is better than idleness.
The Little Fire in Our Heart
At some point, the burning fire in one’s heart goes dim: this was exactly the indifference I felt on Tuesday afternoon when I got an invite for an online aptitude test from Flutterwave. The year has had its toll on me.
Fast forward to the third week of July, I received another mail from the People’s Operations Team at Flutterwave that my application and test wasn’t successful. Over the years, I’ve witnessed how grief comes to the party uninvented. How bad days come with no warning signs. In this part of my world, it’s just vibes and grace.
Flutterwave.
Between me and my Yahoo mail, there's no love lost; tired of the various 'hope this meets you well' or 'you had the qualities we were looking for'. Sometimes your Jesus wishes that you were outrightly betrayed without the kiss, but that's what happens when People Operations|HR tries to dress the pain. I've gotten accustomed to rejections emails, I've learned how to shake them off with a good sleep; but this evening, the Bible Study wouldn't welcome such.
Everything Outside the Box Is A Miracle
Sometimes, when there’s nothing to gain and nothing to lose, one goes ahead doing things outside the box. As I read through the rejection letter from Flutterwave’s Peoples team, the last full stop wouldn’t leave my phone screen. It was there, disturbing the nuance of my being. So, I decided to reply with an appreciation mail, hoping that would make me feel better.
A Mail in form of Answered Prayer
Mansi Babyloni, the Global Head of the People’s Operations Team, who has now become a story I will always tell, accidentally or in God’s design, saw my mail and got moved by my words, this prayer. This wasn’t the intent; I had only written an appreciation mail to a company I’ve come to love and wished I was part of, and also because I wanted to feel better, but to her, it was more.
Mansi gave me the courage to dream, as she wrote herself into my lineage’s appreciation note.
I wasn’t to be considered for a job with Flutterwave; in fact not considered for an interview or the process of recruitment; but Mansi Babyloni who herself just recently joined the firm, saw something more, and gave me the opportunity to prove myself in an interview.
Miracle
Miracle happens quick and fast, and each day you bless the universe for bringing certain people across your path. I love you MB
Archive
This is how I choose to remember the experiences 2020 had offer: my journey in Flutterwave; the ups and downs; and people like Mansi Babyloni that I will always remember for being a light in my path. To the remaining days in the year: I wish for more vibes and grace.
ps:
#EndSars
